OK, so I've been doing some online research as my efforts to wrap my arms around the many changes involved in successfully parenting stepkids and my own continue. I have repeatedly come across the terms "bonus kids" and "blended family."
First, "bonus kids." What the heck does that mean? Didn't we know in advance of marriage that our spouse had kids? Look up bonus and you'll see "extra, a premium, more than usual." That all sounds nice, but hardly applies to my stepkids; they're people, not a special surprise I found at the bottom of a cereal box.
As to "blended family." Hmm, is that really what we're doing? When I cook and the recipe calls for blending, everything gets smoothly mixed together to create a uniform substance. While I hope that my husband and I are creating a good family experience for our kids, we're hardly blended. His kids are his; mine are mine. It's not like they get all mixed up and we can't pick out which ones we brought into the marriage.
And so, there must be a better way to describe what we're creating here. If not blended, then what? Suggestions, my readers?
Until next time, choose happy.
I agree with you concerning both terminology, but found myself reluctantly writing blended family, because we are not a blended family. I tried to come up with a word to better suit my situation other than "blended," but could not. I haven't even found a word in the Bible to describe our situation. So, if you find a word to best describe "family" please let me know.
ReplyDeleteFamily to me is when the union of two are joined as one. The children of these individuals should be embraced by love and acceptance, and considered as part of the family unit despite their origin through the union of their parents. We truly must follow the principals of God. We are His children through creation, yet, He only had one Son. Jesus. And through the death of Christ we are all related. The Bible gives us a perfect example. We are referred to as sister's and brother's in relation through Christ. Yet, we have a problem with loving or accepting (if not both) children that were created by other individuals. For the word of God clearly states, how can we love him (God) whom we have not seen, and hate someone who we have seen. I am really struggling with this whole issue, so, if you can help me along the way of helping yourself, I will be forever grateful. :)
Your sincere follower,
Della